• Coventry Patmore

    Magna est Veritas

    Here, in this little Bay,
    Full of tumultuous life and great repose,
    Where, twice a day,
    The purposeless, glad ocean comes and goes,
    Under high cliffs, and far from the huge town,
    I sit me down.

    For want of me the world’s course will not fail;
    When all its work is done, the lie shall rot;
    The truth is great, and shall prevail,
    When none cares whether it prevail or not.

  • Arthur Guiterman

    On the Vanity of Earthly Greatness

    The tusks which clashed in mighty brawls
    Of mastodons, are billiard balls.

    The sword of Charlemagne the Just
    Is Ferric Oxide, known as rust.

    The grizzly bear, whose potent hug,
    Was feared by all, is now a rug.

    Great Caesar’s bust is on the shelf,
    And I don’t feel so well myself.

  • T S Eliot

    It will do you no harm to find yourself ridiculous.
    Resign yourself to be the fool you are.

  • Raymond Queneau

    Entropy

    The woodman weighs up the oaks; the calendar, the years; the pamphlet, hatreds; the boxer, his teeth; the locksmith, bolts; the sweet maker, fondant bonbons; the jeweller, chalcedonies; the tamer, the elephams; the coiffeur, combs; the hatter, turbans; the impresario, new prodigies; the ridingmaster, white stallions; the juggler, full spheres; the conjurer, empty spheres. The weight of things requires attention, though it may be we feel little anxiety at the supposed law of matter’s ruin, for in the end all things re-unite: the years in the rings ofthe oaks, the look of hatred in the teeth, the fondant bonbons in the cakeholes of keyholes, the precious stones in the finery of the elephants, the combs beneath wound cloths, the hoarse prodigies in galloping fame, and the spheres with the spheres in topological bouquets.

    Now everything is clear.

  • Seamus Heaney

    The Rescue

    In drifts of sleep I came upon you.
    Buried to your waist in snow.
    You reached your arms out: I came to
    Like water in a dream of thaw.

  • F E Smith

    In court, as a young barrister:

    Judge: I have read your case, Mr Smith, and I am no wiser now than I was when I started.
    Smith: Possibly not, My Lord, but much better informed.

  • Diogenes of Sinope

    Do not take from me what you cannot give.

    Said to Alexander the Great who had gone to see Diogenes, who at time was lying in the sun. Standing in front of him, Alexander, the most powerful man in the world, made an offer to the philopsopher, saying “Whatever you ask of me, I will be pleased to give to you”. In response to this remarkable offer Diogeens requested that Alexander should stop blocking his sunlight before adding the statement above.

    In reply Alexander stated that “If I was not Alexander, I would wish to be Diogenes”

  • Billy Collins

    Introduction To Poetry

    I ask them to take a poem
    and hold it up to the light
    like a color slide

    or press an ear against its hive.

    I say drop a mouse into a poem
    and watch him probe his way out,

    or walk inside the poem’s room
    and feel the walls for a light switch.

    I want them to waterski
    across the surface of a poem
    waving at the author’s name on the shore.

    But all they want to do
    is tie the poem to a chair with rope
    and torture a confession out of it.

    They begin beating it with a hose
    to find out what it really means.

  • Tom Hopkins

    I am not judged by the number of times I fail, but by the number of times I succeed; and the number of times I succeed is in direct proportion to the number of times I can fail and keep on trying.

  • Gore Vidal

    There is no human problem which could not be solved if people would simply do as I advise.

  • Henry Carey

    A Lilliputian Ode on their Majesties Accession

    Smile, smile,
    Blest Isle!
    Grief past,
    (At last)
    Halcyon
    Comes on.
    New King,
    Bells ring;
    New Queen,
    Blest Scene!
    Britain
    Again
    Revives,
    And thrives.
    Fear flies,
    Stocks rise;
    Wealth flows,
    Art grows.
    Strange Pack,
    Sent back;
    Own Folks
    Crack Jokes.
    Those out
    May pout;
    Those in
    Will grin.

    Great small,
    Pleas’d all.

    God send
    No End,
    To Line
    Divine,
    Of George and Caroline!

    on the coronation of George II in 1727

  • G K Chesterton

    Thieves respect property. They merely wish the property to become their property that they may more perfectly respect it.

  • Wendy Cope

    The sorrow of socks

    Some socks are loners –
    They can’t live in pairs.
    On washdays they’ve shown us
    They want to be loners
    They puzzle their owners,
    They hide in dark lairs.
    Some socks are loners –
    They won’t live in pairs.

  • Ward Cunningham

    I’m not a fan of classification. It’s very difficult to come up with a classification scheme that’s useful when what you’re most interested in is things that don’t fit in, things that you didn’t expect.

  • W S Gilbert

    Sir

    Saturday morning, although recurring at regular well foreseen intervals, always seems to take this railway by surprise.

    beginning a letter of complaint to the station-master at Baker Street station.

  • Lullaby

    Lavender’s Blue

    Lavender’s blue, dilly dilly,
    Lavender’s green
    When you are King, dilly dilly,
    I shall be Queen

    Who told you so, dilly dilly,
    Who told you so?
    ‘Twas my own heart, dilly dilly,
    That told me so

    Call up your friends, dilly, dilly
    Set them to work
    Some to the plough, dilly dilly,
    Some to the fork

    Some to the hay, dilly dilly,
    Some to thresh corn
    Whilst you and I, dilly dilly,
    Keep ourselves warm

    Lavender’s blue, dilly dilly,
    Lavender’s green
    When you are King, dilly dilly,
    I shall be Queen

    Who told you so, dilly dilly,
    Who told you so?
    ‘Twas my own heart, dilly dilly,
    That told me so